Skazyweb

TEACHER: Who is the President of Nigeria? CHILDREN: (They all chorused) Lamido Sanusi! TEACHER: Correct! Who is the Minister of Defence? CHILDREN: Asari Dokubo! TEACHER: Good! What is the capital city of Nigeria? CHILDREN: Enugu! TEACHER: Very good! Who composed the National Anthem? CHILDREN: D-Banj and Elvis Grey! TEACHER: Excellent. What do you call people from Moscow? CHILDREN: Mosquitoe s! TEACHER: Perfect! How much is 2 + 5? CHILDREN: 25! TEACHER: That's great! You're going to be stupid like this until your government increases my salary! One word for this teacher...

SSS confirms 21 deaths after failed jailbreak by Boko Haram men Marilyn Ogar, the spokesperson for the Department of State Security Services (SSS) said yesterday that 21 detained terrorists died during the attempted jailbreak at the Service's headquarters in Abuja on Sunday morning. "Following our earlier releases, it has been established that eighteen (18) casualties were recorded, while two (2) Service personnel sustained serious injuries. Three (3) other detainees who sustained gunshot injuries during the incident have also died. "Meanwhile, investigation is still ongoing to ascertain the immediate and remote causes. "We wish to state that the roads leading to the office were cordoned-off to prevent possible assistance from external collaborators. During this period, the precinct of the office and adjoining neighborhoods were thoroughly searched. "We wish to restate our commitment to the safety of the people and the Nigerian nation at large.” M...

Dear men; would you rock actor IK Ogbonna's shredded jeans? Is this a fashion Yes Yes or a fashion No No ?

Damn! $450,000 Lamborghini Aventador wrecked in crash A Lambor ghini Aventador speed car worth about $450,000 was wrecked in a three-car smash on one of London's most expensive streets, Sloane Street in Knightsbridge, yesterday afternoon. The Lamborghini was involved in the crash with a BMW and a Mazda 5. The matte black  super car collided with the Mazda, then hit a stationary BMW, badly damaging the front of the car. Ouch! I'm seriously hurting for the owner...:-). See more photos after the cut...

'I'm a supporter of polygamy; most African men are polygamous in nature' - Jibola Dabo Nollywood actor Jibola Dabo, who has five children from different women said in a recent interview with TheNetng that he's an ardent supporter of polygamy and believes that most men in Africa are polygamous in nature. Read what he said below and tell us if you agree with him... "People misunderstands what polygamy means. I am an ardent supporter of polygamy. Every single man, mostly from Africa, is polygamous in nature. We are just deceiving ourselves. Polygamy means when you see a woman you love and desire, you marry her with the consent of your already married wife and bring her home. It's not when you have one wife at home, then you have others scattered in different other places, that is not polygamy. And not when you have three wives and you cannot take care of one, that is an insult to polygamy. There are so many women out there who just want to have a man ...

Helen Prest Ajayi & daughter launch auction site, U-wantit.com For mer Miss Nigeria, Helen Prest Ajayi and her eldest daughter Tiffany-Annabelle have launched an online auction site,  u-wantit.com where you can buy luxury items like iPhones, Laptops, Louboutins, Chanel, Louis Vuitton and much more for almost 90% off retail prices. Mrs Ajayi explains how the site works below... I was getting ready to go to a party when I realized the bag I had planned on rocking (as my daughters would say) was missing! After serious interrogation of my daughters, I found the culprit to be my eldest daughter who was planning to rock it at university. In the moment I wanted to shout, but thought about it, really who doesn’t like nice things?    L ike my daughter Tiffany-Annabelle, people want designer things. But sometimes they don’t always have the means to get them when they want them. It’s really hard when you look at Reality TV and magazines and everybody seems to have it but you! ...

New Michael Jackson album release date announced Yep, there's a new Michael Jackson album...five years after his death. Sony and Epic Records today announced a plan to release a posthumous Michael Jackson album titled Xscape Epic CEO L.A. Reid handpicked eight previously unreleased tracks by Michael Jackson, which have been 'contemporized for modern ears' and added new production by Timbaland and Rodney Jerkins. The album drops May 13th.

Pat Utomi planning to convene alternative CONFAB Makes sense!

Comedian Ali Baba shares wardrobe pic online as he blasts 'haters' Lol. Live and Let Live, biko.

Actress Foluke Daramola's husband grabs her boobs in new photo skazy It's his property so it's allowed! :-)

I can’t waste my time on El-Rufai, he’s too small - Pastor Oritsejafor In an interview with Punch today, President of the Christian Association of Nigeria, Pastor Ayo Oritsejafor responded for the first time on Mallam Nasir Elrufai's claims that the private jet he got some months back was from the presidency and not from his church members. (Find story here) Your children in the ministry bought aircraft for you recently, but Mallam Nasir el-Rufai claimed it was a gift from the President. How do you feel about this ? I am glad that there are people who challenged him. I would only be dignifying him if a person at my level starts exchanging words with a small person like el-Rufai. He is too small. I will not dignify him with a response. People responded. They told him that since he knew who gave the gift, he should provide the proof, which he hasn’t done till today. Obviously, he didn’t have any proof. That is the problem with Nigeria. We continue to celebrate people li...

Dear women, you know we can actually hold out until marriage? How many of you watched that Nick Cannon video yesterday where he listed the names of 5 famous women he's slept with? (See it here) Did you hear what he said about Mariah Carey when they asked him when they first slept together? "On our wedding night, honeymoon style, in the Bahamas. That's a real woman there, make you wait, til you got married." Nick said About other women, Nick said " It's LA! That's the whole purpose, you have sex with actresses, singers, models... but Mariah made me wait" In essence, a real woman makes a man wait till they are married before giving herself to him? I know it's really difficult to hold out, especially when you're crazy in love with the guy, but the thing is, men actually respect that. They really do. And whether you sleep with a man or not, if he wants to marry you, he will, right? Personally, I don't know if I can. I'd love to I s...

Pastor Sign Fireman absolved of murder Weeks after he was arrested for the alleged ritual murder of a virgin girl, Pastor Sign Fireman, the founder of Perfect Christianity Mission, has been cleared of all murder charges . The Lagos State Directorate of Public Prosecutions (DPP) absolved the popular pastor of complicity in the murder of a 12 year old virgin after the conclusion of police investigations into the incident. "After a careful consideration of the facts contained in the duplicate file , this office is of the opinion that a prima facie case of murder is established against the primary suspect (Egbo) only. In view of the foregoing, this office shall prosecute Egbo at the state high court for the offence of murder. “On the other hand, the second suspect (Fireman) is to be released forthwith if he is still in custody as no case is established against him,” the DPP stated. Ikechukwu Egbo, the young man who strangled the little girl to death in an abandoned bu...

'Ibinabo should resign as AGN president because of political appointment'- Clarion Chukwurah Actress Clarion Chukwurah has called on the current President of the Actors Guild of Nigeria(AGN) Ibinabo Fiberisima, to resign from office as she has been appointed into a political office by President Jonathan. Ibinabo apointed by President Jonathan on the board of the National Council for Arts and Culture (NCAC) on February 26th. In a two-page statement she released titled, Ibinabo and the AGN visit to President GEJ: Setting The Record Straight, Clarion Chukwurah said since Ibinabo has received the Federal Government's appointment, it is expected of her to vacate office as AGN President and face her new appointment , as Onyeka Onwenu and Kanayo O Kanayo her predecessors did. Continue... "The AGN was not established as a platform to canvass for political appointments or pursue selfish interests. Ms Onyeka Onwenu and Mr Kanayo O. Kanayo listed as examples in her...

My take on the above? She is a paranoid learner. This is the 21st century. What makes her think its a “she” that kept him – and for just two extra minutes? I mean, if a guy’s going to be kept late by a woman, it has to be for like 2 hours. Can I have an amen in the house? Duh! But here’s a possible come back: “Honey, I used Nokia’s HERE Maps. It says 11 minutes. I’m actually early!” If she buys that…

Add http://skazynaija.blogspot.com/caption Water (and fluids in general) is a renowned nemesis of the smartphone. As a rule, once your beloved phone takes a splash or a dunking, that is the beginning of the end of days for it. As such, I can imagine that you must be interested in a water proof smartphone. Your friendly super hero, Super Mo, has drawn up a list of water proof smartphones that are currently available in Nigeria. Note that while there are water proof mobiles from various manufacturers globally, at the moment, only Sony seems to be officially marketing such devices in Nigeria. Sony Sony Xperia V – N46,000 Sony Xperia Z – N66,000 Sony Xperia Z1 – N93,000 Sony Xperia Z Ultra – N99,000 Sony Xperia Tablet Z – N98,000 Below are other manufacturers and their water proof devices that may or may not be seen in this market. Huawei Huawei is officially in Nigeria, but I have no information on the availability of the water proof Honor 3 and Ascend D2. Samsung Samsung is ...

Yeni Kuti’s ex-husband got in a deadly bike accident in Lagos about a week ago and died in hospital on March 21, 2014, Friday. He and Yeni Kuti had a daughter. Femi Segun was the son of award winning Nigerian novelist, Mabel Segun. He was also the National Publicity Secretary of Igbobi College, Old Boys Association. Rest in peace.

I have been on the scene long enough to see bullshit (pardon my French) and recognise it for what it is. Back in the early 2000s, we had scores of individuals promising people instruction on how to make millions of Naira monthly from the internet. I used to run a web host at that time, so that put me in a privileged position. You see, all of them needed web hosting to put up their websites – and a significant number came to host with us. There was this guy who always rode commercial motorcycles to and from my office. He would come looking raggedy. He was the template for all the others. They were replicas of him to different degrees. It was all a big hustle: struggling individuals making claims about having made millions online and offering the secrets behind that to unsuspecting others. Every time that you read or hear something like, “ It is very easy to do. You do not need any special computer skills or qualifications. Anybody can do what I’m doing and start making a...

Nigerian actress, Rukky Sanda was recently spotted in these tights which certainly did not leave much to the imagination. The outline of her private area seems pretty obvious, but the actress does not seem to mind. Or maybe she did not notice. What do you guys think?

Jim Iyke In London To Shoot New Episodes Of ‘Unscripted’   All smiles... Jim Iyke gets comfy in London (Daniel Sync) Jim Iyke Arrives London (Daniel Sync) Some broken hearts never mend Keturah Hamilton Cries Out: “Jim Iyke Used And Dumped Me Like A Filthy Rag” Jim Iyke Displays His 6 Packs Ahead Of ‘Unscripted’ Premiere The Star Actor Looks Yummy! In Your Face! Jim Iyke’s Unscripted Is Actually Scripted And Acted! Nollwood star Actor, Jim Iyke , has arrived the United Kingdom to film episodes of his ‘Jim Iyke Unscripted’ reality TV show. The strapping actor, touched down in London yesterday, amidst a flurry of activities and ...

Gunmen attack Senate Presidents Convoy in Imo The convoy of Nigeria's Senate President, David Mark , was attacked yesterday by unknown gunmen who specifically targeted the vehicle in which Senator Mark was to enter, Channels TV reports. David Mark was on his way to the burial ceremony of late business mogul, John Richard Anyaehie in Nkwerre Community in Imo State when the attack happened. Report say no life was lost in the attack.

Bowen University closed indefinitely following students' riot The management of Bowen University this morning closed the school indefinitely following students' protest last night. Students of the private uni. say they are protesting scarcity of electricity, water and plans by the university to increase school fees. The students say they are not being treated right "They take the light by 8am, and bring it back by 8pm and it goes off by 11pm again. We don't have water, no socket light, while our lecturers are in AC offices and cars. We have time table for eating. 7-9am for breakfast, 12-3 for lunch and 6-8 for dinner. Most times we have classes during these periods" one student told me. All students have been asked to leave the university...while some students who were detained last night after the riot are yet to be released. Continue... Students protesting at the front of the VC's office this morning after they were told to vacate school premises....

Music stars go in search of their look-alikes as #MTNCelebdouble begins selection M TN Ambassadors are generating excitement among the youth, especially the followers of the entertainment industry, as the likes of Wizkid, Davido, Iyanya, Kcee, Don Jazzy, Praiz, Tiwa Savage, Chidinma, iMike and Harrysong  go in search of their look-alikes. Supported by the largest ICT company in Africa, the initiative will give the over 70,000,000 youth population an opportunity to share the spotlight with some of the finest musical superstars in the country. In addition, a VIP treat and invitations to exclusive youth parties, with the celebrities in attendance, are already in place for the look-alikes and fans. Continue... Speaking with one of the artistes, Iyanya Mbuk, he said “the objective of this youth-centric, entertaining initiative is to connect the teeming youth population, who cherish stardom and have been supportive, with their favourite artistes as well as help fans in general bond with...